139 | Finding Purpose and Truthfulness Amid Life's Unexpected Turns

Episode Summary

In this episode of the Professor's Playbook/Becoming UnDone, Toby Brooks shares his transformative journey from discontentment and frustration to fulfillment and gratitude. Relaying his personal experiences of being passed over for a desired job in Lubbock, Toby opens up about the emotional turmoil and ultimately finding peace in unexpected changes. As time progressed, an opportunity at Baylor University emerged, aligning perfectly with his professional aspirations and family needs. This narrative artfully illustrates the podcast's theme: waiting for "something more" to come, as Toby strategically aligned his career goals with his core values.

Listeners will gain insight into Toby's perseverance and the role truthfulness played throughout his journey. Through self-reflection and deliberate action, Toby demonstrates the importance of living an 'unconcealed' life—known as 'alethea' in Greek—and how this virtue underpins effective leadership, integrity in data management, and authentic relationships. The discussion further delves into how truthfulness bridges gaps between spoken ideals and practiced realities, ensuring that personal and professional lives are deeply rooted in accuracy and integrity.

Key Takeaways

• Embrace Change: Sometimes, life's unforeseen circumstances lead to greater opportunities, as seen in Toby's journey from Lubbock to Baylor.
• Truthfulness as a Virtue: Living an unconcealed life is vital, aligning words, actions, and intentions with reality.
• Balance in Leadership: Authenticity, feedback with care, and courageous advocacy define effective leadership and team culture.
• Integrity in Data Practices: Accurate data collection and reporting build trust and inform sound decision-making in healthcare professions.
• Personal Growth: Waiting periods often serve as preparation stages for more significant outcomes, emphasizing patience and faith.

Notable Quotes

• "I have every confidence that this was the something more that was coming, that all the while I was too impatient to wait for."
• "Truthfulness isn't about what we say. It's about who we are."
• "Sometimes we just need to wait. If I'd had my way, I would have rushed to any of a hundred jobs just to make my ego feel better."
• "In the Greek, the word for truthfulness is alethea, which literally means unconcealed—Not just being honest, but living unhidden."
• "Truthfulness in our systems equals trustworthiness in our leadership."

Resources

• Connect with Toby Brooks on Linktree
• Explore more episodes of Professor's Playbook and Becoming Undone on major podcast platforms like Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and iHeartRadio.

Tune in to this enlightening episode of the Professor's Playbook to understand the power of truthfulness and patience in personal and professional spheres. Discover more inspiring content and stay ahead in your journey of continuous learning and growth.

Transcript

0:00:09 - (Toby Brooks): I was blown away. What would have undoubtedly brought me to tears just two years ago today brought a smile to my face. And what would have most likely made me probably leave the sanctuary back in Lubbock brought an indescribable peace to my soul this morning in Waco. Let me explain. Four or five years ago, I found myself torn between goals that I had unfulfilled somewhere else and the blessing of being a husband and a dad who was fully present.

0:00:42 - (Toby Brooks): Have you ever found yourself in that uncomfortable in between space between where you are and where you feel like you need to be? I absolutely have. I've long had a goal and a dream and an unmistakable purpose in my soul to serve and to inspire. And while I appreciated the job that I had at Tech at the Health Sciences center and I love my students, I knew deep down in my heart that I needed to be doing more.

0:01:11 - (Toby Brooks): I wanted to impact more lives. I'd hope that would be in Lubbock. My school was growing and I was sure that I would get a chance to be a new Vice Provost. That would have allowed me to grow and to serve without having to move and disrupt life for my family. And unfortunately, the Lord had other plans. I started to realize that first when one of the high ranking leaders at the school that I'd hoped to work for brought in someone from his previous institution to fill the role that I legitimately thought had been created just for me.

0:01:48 - (Toby Brooks): Not only did I not get the job, I wasn't even interviewed. Imagine my surprise and my shock when I had applied. I was essentially counting the days down until I would get a promotion. Didn't hear anything. So I logged into the HR application portal and there I saw it in all caps, bright red letters, bold, Company not in interested. After a decade and a half and a position that I thought was mine, I didn't even get an email.

0:02:21 - (Toby Brooks): Company not interested. So, trying to see the purpose in it all, I regrouped. I worked for three solid years after that, often volunteering to serve that same guy who got the job that I thought was mine. And I was trying to build a teaching and learning center for my institution. After several meetings over several months, I finally requested a formal meeting to Fisher cut bait. Let's ask him officially, is this proposal of mine ever going to get a chance to really exist? I was understandably nervous about it.

0:02:57 - (Toby Brooks): Put on my best suit and tie, I was prepared with a full color proposal. I was confident that this was either my moment to shine or to know without a doubt that this was never going to happen. Before we could even begin the discussion, he dismissed me. Hope he didn't dress up for my sake, he said. We chatted briefly, but he reiterated that he didn't know when, if ever, my proposal would ever be formally considered.

0:03:25 - (Toby Brooks): Friend, I would be lying if I told you anything other than I stepped out of that meeting absolutely devastated. And not long after, I was angry. I was livid, actually. My kids had grown up in Lubbock. This was home. Why would God allow me to have to continue to be passed over for a job that I knew in my heart I was made to do? Or why would he make me move to have to do it? I have a spot that I visit even to this day when we go back to Lubbock, where I would think pray honestly, I have it out with God.

0:04:03 - (Toby Brooks): It's a little lake in a neighborhood not far from our home of 15 years, and I would usually run or walk or somehow end up at that same spot by that lake with the fountain and at the end have it out with God. Why would you let me suffer like this? Why can't you allow me to serve? Why aren't doors opening? Why do I have to move just to feel fulfilled? My kids love it here. It's home. My wife loves it here. Her job is here.

0:04:33 - (Toby Brooks): And over time, I grew embittered. I was praying for something to change when it just wouldn't. I applied to hundreds of other jobs. I tried to find remote work. I didn't want to leave Lubbock, but I knew I'd outgrown the spot where I was. In the early spring of 2024, I saw a dream job come up. Not only was there a center like I'd been trying to build at the HSC for more than four years, already up and running at Baylor, they were hiring my son. Tay was set to graduate in May.

0:05:13 - (Toby Brooks): The job would start in June or July. The timing was perfect. The job was a dream. I applied immediately, I interviewed, and I got it from company not interested in all red caps A couple years earlier to we are pleased to offer you on letterhead in Baylor Green. Now, I'm not gonna lie, the change has not been easy. In fact, there are days when the distance between Waco and Lubbock and the miles between that daughter and that son that we had to leave behind feels like from here to Jupiter.

0:05:58 - (Toby Brooks): But I have every confidence that this was the something more that was coming, that all the while I was too impatient to wait for. So that's why this morning I could not help but Smile as the Praise band sang out these lyrics from their song Fallow ground.

0:06:23 - (B): I will lift my hands in this buried place I will sing again. You are forming me that'll end my weary heart can understand help me trust you more and more. Tell me trust you more and more.

0:06:55 - (Toby Brooks): You know, I wish I could tell you in the midst of that purpose storm that I was strong enough and brave enough and wise enough to have said something just like that. Unfortunately, I didn't. I was hurting. I was sulking. I was pouting. Sometimes going weeks between petulant prayers, I just could not fathom why God was leaving me to suffer. And as it turns out, that's because he wasn't. I wasn't being punished.

0:07:26 - (Toby Brooks): I was being prepared. So when this bridge hit this morning in worship.

0:07:34 - (B): In the waiting the ground is he. Something more is coming. Something more is coming.

0:07:49 - (Toby Brooks): I heard in those words of the song the heart of God that I felt like had been pinned just for me. Sometimes we just need to wait. If I'd had my way, I would have rushed to any of a hundred jobs just to make my ego feel better. To run somewhere that wanted me to go from company not interested to company interested. But it just wasn't time. Instead, we stayed put in Lubbock, and my son had a magical senior year at Lubbock Christian, finishing state runner up in football, first team all state in baseball, state champion and band.

0:08:30 - (Toby Brooks): And the daughter, her junior year, I got to be with her. I got to have lunch with her, got to go to her concerts and hear her sing. I'd have probably missed all that. But God said, just wait. Shut up and wait. The hardened ground of my heart needed to heal. Something more was coming. Today I have a job at a university that, honestly, I love. I have the most phenomenal class of 16 young professionals who I hope are listening to this right now to know what a blessing each and every one of them has been to me.

0:09:08 - (Toby Brooks): Because I get to go all in teaching and talking and discussing not just the what of athletic training, but the how the virtues that inform the people they are becoming. And that's no longer forbidden, it's encouraged. Something more was coming. And in that moment this morning, I was absolutely overcome. Not with bitterness, not with fear, not with regret, not with anger, not with animosity. I was thankful.

0:09:52 - (Toby Brooks): Welcome back to the Professor's Playbook, where we break down complex topics in athletic training, sports medicine and movement science into practical, applicable knowledge. I'm Dr. Shelby Brooks. Today we're diving deep into a virtue that's Easy to understand, but infinitely hard to master truthfulness in the clinic, in the classroom, in life. If you're tuning in to becoming undone, sometimes I cross post these.

0:10:16 - (Toby Brooks): So sharing this one with my audience over there as well. I hope you'll enjoy what does it really mean to be truthful? Not just not lying, but actually living a life aligned with your truth. That's what we're unpacking today. We'll talk about the difference between truth and cruelty. Explore how data integrity and documentation practices tie directly to our character, and ultimately how truthfulness can build or break trust in our leadership.

0:10:45 - (Toby Brooks): Let's get into it. We tend to think of truthfulness as simple. Just don't lie. And that's easy enough, right? But in the Greek, the word for truthfulness is alethea, which literally means unconcealed. Not just being honest, but living unhidden. Truthfulness isn't about what we say. It's about who we are. Are our actions aligned with our values? Do our decisions reflect our intentions? Are our relationships built on trust or on performance?

0:11:19 - (Toby Brooks): Truthfulness is a habit of aligning our words, our actions and our intentions with reality. And like all virtues, truthfulness lives between two extremes, so called golden mean. On one side we have the vice of deficiency, and that's dishonesty. This one's obvious misleading patience. Faking documentation. Saying what others want to hear, even when it's not right. It erodes our trust and our moral authority.

0:11:43 - (Toby Brooks): Now, who among us has not shared a little white lie? But within that comes a vice of deficiency. On the flip, the vice of excess. And that's brutal candor. People that just keep it real. Right? The kind of I'm just being honest attitude that wields truth like a weapon. Unfiltered feedback can crush more than it helps. And it's sharing facts without empathy or timing. Real truthfulness is about balance, speaking truth with humility, courage and compassion.

0:12:16 - (Toby Brooks): So let's apply it. Truthfulness and practice. Let's break this down for the real world. What does it look like to practice truthfulness in our work as healthcare professionals? First in care decisions? Accurate documentation. If we didn't write it down, it didn't happen. Our documentation has to reflect what really occurred, not what should have happened or what you think happened. This builds both legal and ethical credibility.

0:12:38 - (Toby Brooks): It also means transparent communication. Patients deserve the truth about their condition, even when that's uncomfortable. Telling the truth in kindness is still telling the truth. We don't want to hide behind thinly veiled euphemisms. And then lastly, it's integrity under pressure. When mistakes happen, and they will, we have to own them. We have to correct them. We earn more trust by being honest than by pretending to be perfect.

0:13:05 - (Toby Brooks): Number two, leadership and team culture. First, we've got authenticity. We want to be the same person in private as we are in public. Our team can see through that mask. Consistency builds respect. It also means feedback with care. Yeah, we should be honest with students and colleagues, but couch it in encouragement. You've heard of the correction sandwich where there's something positive with the correction in the middle followed by something positive.

0:13:30 - (Toby Brooks): We don't want to crush their spirit in the process. And then lastly, courage and advocacy. Sometimes truthfulness means standing up for what's right even when it's risky. Speaking up when it's easier to stay silent. That's leadership. Now let's connect this to our second key focus, data driven decision making and information management. But here's the thing. Data is only as good as the integrity of the person collecting it.

0:13:57 - (Toby Brooks): We live in a world that is increasingly running on data. Athlete performance metrics, injury reports, treatment plans, progress tracking. What happens if that data isn't accurate? If it's not truthful? What happens when notes are copied forward from yesterday without updates? When reports are rounded up to make progress look better? When negative outcomes aren't recorded because it might make us look bad?

0:14:18 - (Toby Brooks): It sounds like minor stuff until it's not. Our credibility as a clinician and as a leader. Honestly, it's rooted in our integrity. If our records aren't reliable, our decisions won't be either. It's not to say I'm perfect. It's not to say you're perfect. You will make mistakes. I know. I sure have. But as I continue to grow and as I continue to try to work through this season, I recognize that I want to do it with integrity.

0:14:43 - (Toby Brooks): Truthfulness in our systems equals trustworthiness in our leadership. So let's recap today's playbook. Truthfulness isn't just telling the truth. It's living truthfully. A aligning our words, our actions and our intentions with reality. It lives in the balance between deception and brutality. There's a happy medium to be had there. And in our work, truthfulness shows up in clear communication, accurate documentation, ethical leadership and transparency under pressure.

0:15:16 - (Toby Brooks): In your data practices, truthfulness ensures that your decisions are anchored in what is not what you wish they were. So here's your challenge this week. Audit one area of your life for truthfulness. Maybe it's your documentation practices. If you're a healthcare professional. Maybe it's a tough conversation you've been avoiding. Maybe it's just a self check on whether what you say matches who you are when no one's watching. Pick one area, name it, and align.

0:15:48 - (Toby Brooks): If you found today's episode useful, be sure to subscribe, share and leave a review. You can connect with me@LinkTR, EE, TobyBrooksPhD or leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, iHeartRadio or wherever you get your podcasts. Got a new website hopefully launching this week@tobybrooksphd.com Honestly, I hate having to use that PhD at the end. It feels petty, but unfortunately that domain was taken so we get what we get. We don't throw fit.

0:16:16 - (Toby Brooks): Your feedback helped shape the direction of the show and I'm grateful for your insights. Thanks again for tuning in to Professor's Playbook. Those of you that are joining from Becoming Undone. Until next time, be purposeful, be relentless, Never stop learning. And this week especially, align your life with truth. But above all else, listen to your stinking Professor.